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What do homeschooled girls and trash cans have in common? They both only leave the house once a week. This joke was well-received among homeschooled youth because it rang true for so many of us. For almost all of my teen years, church was the only social activity that I engaged in, the only time during the whole week that I might have a chance to interact with people who were not my immediate family. Making friends in that context, especially as a shy teen girl, seems daunting. However, I had an even greater obstacle to deal with: I was not allowed to participate in youth group. My parents were absolutely terrified of teenage rebellion. Thanks to various books and speakers popular in the homeschooling community, my parents believed teen rebellion to be a recent American trend due to indulgent parenting and peer pressure. A rebellious teen was more than just an annoyance in the homeschooling community: that teen was turning his/her back not only on the parents, but also on G

"Biblical" Parenting, Criticism #3: A Parent Who Tries to Change Minds and Hearts through Spanking

This is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here . Read criticism #1 here . Read criticism #2 here . Read criticism #4 here . Read the conclusion here . To briefly review, my first criticism of Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" discussed the way his advice pushed parents toward the worst possible interpretation of their child's behavior at the expense of mercy and understanding. My second criticism looked at the extreme level of control that parents are urged to have over their child's mind and body, which can prevent the child from maturing and can put the parent at risk of developing abusive habits. Now here is my third criticism. Criticism #3: Parents are instructed to use spanking as their primary tool of discipline, not only for behavior modification but also to force the child to change their opinions or feelings. Spanking is one of those hot button issues;

"Biblical" Parenting, Criticism #1: A Parent Who Assumes The Worst

This is part of a series of posts reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips". Read the introduction here . Read criticism #2 here . Read criticism #3 here . Read criticism #4 here . Read the conclusion here . The task of reviewing Reb Bradley's book "Child Training Tips" has been a lot more challenging than I expected. First of all, where do I start when I disagree with almost every sentence that this book contains? I can find almost no common ground on which to begin. And how can I explain my reasons for disagreement when the very things that I see as horrifying are held up as admirable goals by the author? Because of these difficulties, I have decided that these posts will simply be a way for Present Me to explain to Past Me that this so-called "Biblical" parenting is damaging to individuals and relationships because it sacrifices all other virtues for the sake of authority and submission. Those quotation marks are arou

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Homeschooled Girls and Trash Cans: The Social Isolation of Homeschooling

"Biblical" Parenting, Criticism #3: A Parent Who Tries to Change Minds and Hearts through Spanking

"Biblical" Parenting, Criticism #1: A Parent Who Assumes The Worst